when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
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What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
then they caught me trying to hide the turtle in the fridge
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
The number of injuries I get impersonating Shakira while drunk is getting ridiculous. Sprained vagina, dude.
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
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