You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
I want Jason Statham to talk British to my vagina.
I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
Everything tastes like Lysol. Am I dying?
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
During my first week as an adjunct prof, I played a fiercely fought game of squash with a law student and we wound up having hot, sweaty, angry sex right on the floor of the court. She is either the best or worst thing to happen to my academic career. Will let you know.
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
Randomize
