So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
You know it's been a successful day when the only reason you put on a bra was to take off your shirt
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
Randomize
