she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
Dude. My tinder just blew up in Seattle. I'm moving here. I don't give a fuck
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
