i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
Just when I thought this night couldn't get any worse, my dad sang and dedicated Sexual Healing to me at kareoke night.
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im doing shots of vodka in the bathroom covered in pillows.
Tornado warnings are fun!
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
I just slipped on ice and peed on my pea coat. There's a pun there but I'm too sad to make it
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
I'm just drunk enough to be eating egg rolls on the toilet
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
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