You work out of a Hotel?
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
Someone just walked into the bar with a pillow
I don't know whether to judge him or give him a high five
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
well I've taken an Uber to my weed dealers twice in the past 2 weeks so it's going well since I sold my car
I lost the right to judge tonight
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
Randomize