So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
Its 6am and I'm sitting on the couch watching Clifford. Crying into my risotto because emily elizabeth helped the girl in the wheelchair get over her stagefright so she can win a trophy. Never drinking alone again.
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
Randomize
