You ran away and I found you three blocks later lying by a dumpster because "that's where your life belongs"
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wait. Did you let me snort wine last night cause I wanted to smell jesus's blood?
Yes. I have pictures. Your soul is mine.
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
God, I missed his penis.
Randomize