"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
5am, I am wayy too drunk for this. Hookers came out of nowhere. They're like ninjas. Some poor soul got the fat one, tomorrow's going to be interesting...
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
So your contact has been changed to "jizz weave" in my phone. Now, as strange and random as that may be, I'm slightly embarrassed to say that I have more than one contact that fits that description so please identify yourself.
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
Randomize
