I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
I thought it was my alarm clock, turns out it was her vibrator still going off on the side of my face.
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
She complained to dominos last night for hanging up on her, and then she wrote "fuck you dominos" on the receipt when we got our pizza
So we are banned from the campus dominos
Jack said he hasn't jerked off in like two weeks and he's like a smoldering volcano who wants to bury you like Pompeii with his man gravy
Randomize
