just survived the first fart of the relationship.
What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
Randomize
