According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
You were buying shots for everyone, saying, "I got a tax refund. I'm a MILLIONAIRE."
I ran into my boss at the liquor store on our lunch hour we both just stood there awkwardly until i was like your car bar or mine hahaha we both need a cab
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
I told him I want him to read me my Miranda rights while he's fucking me. Act exactly like he does while he's on duty except with his dick out.
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
Randomize
