can we get nightvision for the apartment?
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
Spilled red wine all over my bed. This has to be the fiftieth time ive refused to fall asleep without a drink in my hand
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
People spilled so much that there was a thin film of beer on the floor. You took a running start, screamed, "SLIP AND SLIDE!" and slid face first through the drywall.
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
I just bought condoms and a potted plant, making for a top ten super weird and awkward purchase.
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
Randomize
