The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
Did you ask last night's taxi driver about his penis hygiene?
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
I need to wash the frat house off of me
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
Randomize
