Me too!
I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
I think she just tried to waterboard me with her vagina.
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
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