He asked me if I "almost moaned"
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
he said i was chugging vodka in the parking lot, gave my # to a married man, started a food fight, and passed out at the bar. how could he NOT consider that a good first date???
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
He asked me what I wanted the cake to say and I then asked him if "I'm sorry for throwing up in your bed last night" was too long. He said it was...
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
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