she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
I wish life had little blips of pornography
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
This morning I saw a frozen puddle in front of my RA's door and I laughed, assuming someone poured water in hopes that she would slip and fall. That's when my roommate told me I had peed there last night. Thank you Captain Morgan!
Today was the day I stopped kidding myself and started buying the handle of vodka.
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
Woke up with an epic boner today, the kind where you can spin books and shit on it. FYI: don't try spinning an encyclopedia
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
Randomize
