this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
The last two calls in my phone are dominos and 911. I'm not sure how my night went.
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
just when his roommates walked in, we were naked in the kitchen. proceeded to awkwardly pretzel walk back into his room to cover each other (not that they haven't seen me naked plenty of times) and continue to have glorious morning sex. his roomates love me.
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
I walked a mile in this weather wearing nothing but a toga. Zero fucks. Your move Mother Nature.
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
Randomize
