:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
I just snorted a line of adderall through a rolled up business card for the Michigan Law Admissions Office.... Tell me I'm not motivated
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
I'm going to start referring to my liver is Livy. I feel like if I give it an affectionate nickname it will hate me less. Livy isn't ready for syllabus week.
I think we all know your liver needs a man's name.
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
Randomize
