just woke up and my boobs have "fun police" written on them
So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
For our 1st date, he tried to schedule a rock climbing. I suggested, "how about we meet at my place and you can scale Mt. Vagina?"
He threw me over his shoulder and carried me outside, all the while drinking from the bottle of rum he was holding, while my ex watched. I'm winning the break-up.
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
Randomize
