super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
What are these yellow papers in the kitchen?
These are the tickets we got last night.
Did i sign this one as Grizzly Bear?
Yes...yes you did.
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
I think i lit a firework with a joint. happy birthday, america?
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
His wife just cheated on him for the third time. I'm his first extra-marital fling, that makes it ok, right? You know to keep karma balanced in the universe
Your logic is flawless...
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
I cut him off because he was changing my thermostat every time he came over
You made the right decision
Randomize
