Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
I realized i make the same noise when i get a blow job as when i eat pizza
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
whose parrot is this?
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
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