I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
Urine might work for jellyfish stings, but we found out it doesn't work well for nose bleeds...
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
Slept with a member of the band last night, found out today after extensive stalking he’s engaged. Pro tip: don’t research one night stands.
Randomize
