Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
Remember when I use to call my dick 'the pendulum'
wtf?
It is now the artist formerly known as 'insideyourgirlfriend'
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
A true measure of a good friend is how long she responds to her friends drunken illogical texts. Youre a champ.
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
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