so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
someone get that fucking seahorse.
I read the police report. You asked the cop if you could use his in-car computer to update your facebook. No way you get out of a DUI.
Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
The girl beside me at the laundromat is bitching a guy out on the phone for jizzing on her bedspread. She had to use a triple machine to wash it.
Ok in all seriousness. Alcohol intake is now restricted for me. I found handcuffs in my trunk.
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
Even my conscience is telling me to take this Wednesday's exam buzzed.
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize
