Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
Came home and the girl was sitting on the steps "talking" on her ipod touch AND was halfway done eating a raw cucumber.
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
Did you just see the Batmobile???
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
It's not quite a landing strip... It's more like a soul patch for my vagina.
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
He challenged me to a drink off, I couldn't just say no. It was a matter of pride really.
And as he was cursing your name from the bathroom you were ordering yourself another drink on his tab. The poor bastard had no clue you were a pro drunk
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
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