So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
Apparently I blacked out and started wrestling with some dude last night. Just found out I might have dislocated his shoulder. Best part: he still wants to bone me
And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
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