i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
When people ask about my bruises, I'm just going to say it was a doorknob. Or possibly a group of doorknobs. Angry doorknobs.
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
i don't remember much about your party last weekend but i remember you being so drunk you were crying in your driveway about pickles at four am
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
Randomize
