dude I just sharted for the first time ever, kind of gross
well what did you think, shitting your pants would be fun
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
I see more hoeing in ur future
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
Randomize
