I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
In Vegas, have spent the last 48 hours wearing a viking helmet and fanny pack. I consider this to be a career high since drinking is my career
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
He scratched off my spray tan. Literal nail marks down my back. Can't imagine what's underneath his fingernails.
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
Randomize