We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
you dont want to live with me, im always naked, a chronic masturbator, a bit of a voyeur and will likely touch you while you sleep. ps- i can pick locks
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
why im i the only drunk person in the library?
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
So in Aca Taco on grad night 1am, this bitch walks in alone drunk as fuck in her gown to the front of the line and says, "I graduated today...thank YOU"
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
I think I'm going to go into my next therapy session with hot client with my fly down and when he tells me about it I'm going to say "how did that happen?!" and then porn music will start to play.
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
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