They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
Just had perfomance review. I was told the best example of my integrity was when I told my boss I was going to fail the random drug test due to my weekend coke binge. She said that took a lot of character.
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
I didn't even have time to sit down and the nurse was like: ''You've been having unprotected sex.'' HOW DOES SHE KNOW?!?
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
no one ever believes me when I try explaining to them that your straight. I'm all like, "yeah that's his girlfriends dress he's stretching out"
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
Randomize
