worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
8 stitches. Next time I decide to twerk while doing a keg stand, stop me.
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
Randomize