If Rob Pattinson gets another fucking MTV award, I'm going to vomit.
I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
I pretty much just wake up, masturbate at least twice, and go to the beach. #Unemployed. I do look for jobs in between all that tho.
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
Randomize