I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
Now I have the opportunity to have Chris Pratt or Channing Tatum?!? What a time to be alive.
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
Randomize
