Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
im going to hold it over his head for all of eternity. when his children are born i am going to go to the hospital as his wife is giving birth and shove the picture in the childs face, so the first time they see their father is in a drunken stupor looking like a jackass.
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
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