can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
We hit a deer while we were singing an acapella version of "I will always love you"
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
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