he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
Randomize
