Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
... I threw up in the shower this morning
You were "I'm not drunk" drunk.
I was feeling sad so bedroom vodka seemed like the best solution at the time.
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
At this point all my Tinder matches are telling me I'll be fucking the whole male population of UMass '17.
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
Randomize
