i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
and the officer said have you been drinking
and i said NOO SIR.
and he said, I am a woman.
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
I know its hard to believe that I'm already drunk at 12 p.m. but I am, so dont call me asking to go to the gym.
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
I just picked up my phone and one shoe from the man mowing the lawn next to the ice rink. He found them in a tree.
Randomize
