that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
I drank gravy. I actually drank gravy. This is heaven.
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
So that 100 days of sobriety thing I told you about last week? Lasted all of 4 days. Fuck it, life's too short
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
This Cougar is looking at me like I’m a piece of meat and buying me top shelf cocktails
I’m getting a fear boner thinking about what she might do to me
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
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