How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
someone get that fucking seahorse.
It's 10am, I'm at grocery store buying booze b/c the bf just told me that he didn't "technically" break up with his ex.
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
Remember when I puked into a mesh garbage can in the middle of a meeting and told the clients it was "morning sickness"?
hahah yep
Well the are flying back here, it's been like 10 months, should I frame fake baby pics in my office?? Or too much?
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
You were up on table in a neon bra chanting "YOUR MOM" while drizzling vodka on your chest...
no wonder i woke up with my boobs stuck to my bra
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