I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
explain to me why "crisis hotline lolz" is in my contacts?
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
I woke up hugging a box of cheerios that had "wonder woman" written in sharpie on it. So much for a sober night.
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
Would you be so kind as to inform your husband that my truck is forever cursed by mashed potatoes and it's his fault.
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
Randomize
