Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
Last night I somehow got INCREDIBLY wasted & thought it was a good idea to make a group chat with all the guys I'm hooking up with and just say "bye." soo I'm hiding out till next week.
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
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