Awkward is getting caught beating off in the company bathroom...
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
You are the jesus of drinking
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
Weirdest drunk sex ever. His sweat dripped into my eyeball and then he looked down and asked me why I was crying. I went with it.
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
Consider yourself lucky. If I ever run into my ex, all I'll be able to think is, "I let you pee on me and lead me around on a leash."
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
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