I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
Does it count as a shower if I just sat in the tub singing I'm a Little Teapot?
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
my boss made my mugshot into an 'employee of the month' poster.
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
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