Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
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