do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
We stole your phone last night, texted your brother and told him you wanted it up the ass by him. All he said was "I want ur money."
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
Sorry my moustache came off because I was face first in a layered bucket full of jello shots.
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
I ordered more beers for everyone but had to finish them all. I promptly went outside and projectile vomited in the street. Three times.
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
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