Is your liver wearing a sombrero yet?
No...more like a life jacket.
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
He left me a five minute voicemail apologizing for chasing me with a meat beater. I'm actually not sure what that means.
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
Help me help you realize you are a moron
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
Randomize
