I just wanna be some guy's midlife crisis
you kept trying to make scrambled eggs with 3 hardboiled ones.
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
all I want for my birthday is booze and sex toys. don't bother calling if neither of those are included.
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